From the ‘sweet smell of’ to the ‘if at first you don’t…’ mantra instilled into us as children, success is a many faceted fellow and as such requires a healthy dose of perception to percolate it’s honest truth. To be seen to be successful is quite different to feelings of personal success. How many stories do we hear of people who appeared to be successful and yet were deeply unhappy, stressed, even suicidal? How many other stories have we read of folk who have walked away from a supposed successful life to find that simple things can be the most favourable.
Success is generally assumed to be a reflection of prosperity, abundance in some form or another. Joyful & triumphant? Living in luxury, owning expensive accoutrements, a rich life of ease, comfort and yes back to joy.
Personally, I have learned that success is less of an outward show, more an inward know. How did I get to this? Experience. My ‘success’ at running a training school for many years actually lead to burnout, due to being the sole person in charge of all aspects of the business. My most favourite piece was actually on the floor, forest or studio, sharing what I have found works for me and the responses from students as they had their true experiences to steady them on. Yet, too much time seemed to disappear on admin tasks, then website requirements, social media, video requests, so much to give – give – give and all from a tidy pot of what looked from the outside to be success. Yes I always paid rent on time, the obvious bills, ran a car, ate good quality food, but eventually choose to give up this method of working, because I had failed to take care of myself. This screamed at me and had to become a priority, for without me, well, my business cannot function successfully, nor any other aspect of my life. I am in the natural energy medicine arena, so this was somewhat embarrassing and of paramount importance. I needed space and time to review and reappraise, how – I wondered – will this be possible?
I needed to free up having to earn a certain amount to make ends meet and keep my head above water. What was the biggest source of currency snaffling? My home. Long story short, I did it, I gave up having a permanent home nearly 3 years ago and lived in friends spare rooms, became a trusted house sitter for others and was then free to live in another country too when that opportunity beckoned, something I had wished for but had no idea how to make happen. This brought up a whole slew of issues too many to mention here and remember way back when my son was very small, there were days I would think how can I do anything else but take care of him? The realisation came that to get him & me through a whole day safely, in clean clothes (within reason) fed, watered and loved was enough of a success to start with and that anything on top of that was a bonus. I came back to that, true self care = the foundation for success.
Can we be successful without a succession of failures? Do we know what success really is? Can we trust the pull of success to deliver what we think it will? So many points of enquiry, a key topic to concern oneself with. May I ask you?
What do you do to engender your success? How does it feel to be successful?
The feeling for me is the peace of landing after a good day of tasking, and then on days when I’m not so fruitful, accepting that by being here I survived, I made it through another day, success!
And remember we are all winners, that one sperm that pierced our egg won above all the others, we have that chi at our core, we are already successful because we are here & now in this miracle of existence.
To be continued…